Sarah Palin’s Sperminator Quits His Day Job

Saturday, October 3, 2009


Sarah Palin’s sperminator, AKA, Todd Palin, won’t be pulling a shift on Alaska’s frozen North Slope this winter. The husband of the former Alaska governor and vice-presidential candidate quit his day job with BP, the energy company confirmed Thursday.

Company spokesman Steve Rinehart said Todd Palin submitted his resignation effective Sept. 18th, 2009. Todd was a production operator on Alaska’s North Slope where oil comes from multiple wells.

The news comes only a few days after publishing company HarperCollins announced Sarah’s memoir, “Going Rogue: An American Life,” would be released Nov. 17th, several months ahead of schedule, with an initial run of 1.5 million copies. His wife, Sarah, reportedly pocketed a staggering $7 million dollars for her memoir.

The Alaska governor resigned in July with more than a year remaining in her first term, announcing she wouldn’t run for re-election and didn’t want to be considered a “lame duck” governor during her final months in office. Her curious behavior reportedly cost the state at least $1 million dollars.

Palin’s husband, who Alaskans dismissively referred to as the “First Dude,” often accompanied her on the national campaign trail after she was tapped to be the vice-presidential running mate by Sen. John McCain. Todd wowed FOX News’ host Greta Van Susteren with a macho snowmachine ride through the remote woods outside of the Palins’ Wasilla home.

Now that Sarah Palin is a multi-millionairess, I suppose no one can blame Todd for giving up a tough day job on the frozen tundra to settle in as a kept man. Hell, let’s be honest: Todd Palin won the lottery!

This entry was posted in Alaska, News, Politics, Rich Bitches, Sarah Palin, Todd Palin and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

24 Responses to Sarah Palin’s Sperminator Quits His Day Job

  1. TOM339 says:

    “Sarah Palin’s sperminator…..”


    It’s a dirty job but someone has to do it!

  2. Estacada says:

    Todd Palin had a job? Hahahahahaha!

    How is that possible? Everytime McCandy was on the campaign stage, Todd was hovering over or behind her, so how could he have a job?

    Maybe it was seasonal? Like a snow blower? I was truly taken aback to read a number of women think he’s “hot.” I think he looks like he smells of rotten fish heads.

  3. Harry says:

    The National Enquirer says the Palins are headed to divorce court. I know, I know, it’s the National Enquirer but, they broke the John Edwards affair.

  4. woyoyo says:

    That stupid broad got $7 mill for her memoir?

    This country is hopeless. There’s no money to create national healthcare but some publisher had $7 mill to give Sarah Palin. Unreal.

  5. VicoDANIEL says:

    I’m with Estacada. I just assumed Todd was Sarah’s handler, security, go-fer, etc., because he was always at her side during the campaign.

    In fact, we used to discuss this at work and everyone wondered how the Palins were able to feed all those kids, pay a mortgage and otherwise keep up their home when no one worked?

    Did Cindy McCain pay their bills?

  6. bradfrmphnx says:

    If the story from the Enquirer isn’t true, it soon will be. This tumultuous family affair is right out of Payton Place. Todd will get some spousal benefits, write his own dirty memoirs of how Sarah would squeel in tongues during the height of climax, and yes…he won the lottery, absolutely.

  7. Rachel says:

    So with all this money maybe Sarah can buy a book and learn that dinosaurs and humans did not walk the earth at the same moment in earth history? I know it will be a shock for her but, it’s better to be informed than stupid.

  8. Big Hank says:

    Rachel – Why would Sarah Palin buy and read a book?

    After all, she knows everything. Look at the bang-up job she (and the Sperminator) did with Bristol? The girl was barely 16 and she was preggers!

  9. Aunt Peg says:

    Todd Palin won’t work?

    OK then, Papa’s a rolling stone. For most men, their identities are partially defined by their work.

    If Sarah Palin wants a man like that, then I have nothing more to say about it.

  10. She quit her job to spend more time on the side, why not him? All’s fair in love and ghostwritten biographies.

  11. emcee says:

    Who is the ghostwriter? I keep hearing she has ties to the Klan and Stormfront.

    Anyone have her name?

  12. Todd can’t cash that lottery ticket until he heads to divorce court, preferably in a common law state like California.

  13. emcee — The name is Lynn Vincent. She a local (San Diego) hack that co-wrote Donkey Cons. Yeah, I’ve never heard of that book either.

  14. Mets Fan says:

    Come and listen to a story about a man named Todd,
    A poor fisherman, barely kept his family fed,
    Then one day he was slappin’ ’round his wife,
    And up through her cries came an idea,

    Politics that is, VP, memoirs, talkshows

    Well the first thing you know ole Todd’s a millionaire,
    Kinfolk said “Todd move away from Wasilla”
    Said “Manhattin is the place you ought to be”
    So they loaded up the truck and moved to Sutton Place,

    Sutton Place, towers in the sky, FOX News,

    Well now its time to say good by to Todd and all his kin,
    And they would like to thank you folks fer kindly droppin’ in,
    You’re all invited back again to this locality,
    To have a heapin’ helpin’ of their dried fish fillets,
    Y’all come back now, y’hear?

  15. Brigadoon says:

    Mets Fan – LOL! The Palins are white trash with money. The Wasilla Hillbillies.

  16. (O)CT(O)PUS says:

    Since the sperminator has quit is job (funny line, BTW), the arch defender of supply-side economics can now trickle-down on more pregnancy test strips.

  17. Conejo1982 says:

    Has anyone considered the possibility it’s El Todd who has designs on living in the White House and being the First Mister?

    Sarah is many things but smart isn’t one of them.

    I just wonder if Todd is responsible for pushing her higher and higher up the GOP food chain?

  18. libhomo says:

    I wonder if toxicity from working in the oil industry explains birth defects in that family.

  19. Nirbhik says:

    This thread has caused a reader sensation over at today. 1909 views is huge.

    I think the people who objected took offensive to characterizing Todd as Sarah’s “sperminator.” I think it’s at once very funny and quite apt. Good writing, Sir!

  20. i guess between rolling in the speaking fee dough, book money and taking care of TWO babies (after sara is so busy she cant take care of a special needs child and a grandson) todd needed thought Mr Mom was a much better proposition.

    how a bigger bunch of asshole white trash shit gets all this attention is beyond the scope of anyone

  21. Abby Peripatetic says:

    Hi Nirbhik,

    Glad to see you posting here too!

    I checked Christopher’s post at Salon this morning and it was up to 1929 views! Did you read Safe Bets comment? Too funny!

    About the Palins and Sarah’s book, I have to wonder if it would’ve been published at all had Murdock’s publishing company not decided to send it to print? I mean, publishing today is a fool’s folly and who is going to shell out $29.99 to read her say “you betch” 5,275 times?

  22. Fran says:

    I just hope they don’t have enough time on their unemployed hands to create more spawn.

    I would say Todd is in the gravy– but he has to hang out with the winking beauty queen. Ewww!

  23. KarenJ says:

    If the latest from The National Enquirer is true — they have a report from an inside source at HarperCollins that Palin’s book is merely a continuation of her State-of-Alaska press release diatribes aimed at the teenage father of her daughter’s child, not the expected journal-style autobiography — then it turns out Sarah Palin doublecrossed Rupert Murdoch, her HarperCollins benefactor.

    Murdoch paid her $7 million to write a book, but I’m sure he didn’t expect it to be another petty attack on the same teenager she’s been slandering for the past 10 months.

    Palin also failed Murdoch’s litmus test in Hong Kong — few people thought her speech made sense or had merit. No wonder Murdoch has allowed anti-Palin articles to appear lately in his newspapers (the New York Post and the Wall Street Journal).

    Palin made a big mistake trying to con Murdoch.

  24. takayo says:

    I just assumed Todd was Sarah’s handler, security, go-fer, etc., because he was always at her side during the campaign.

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